Chapter 1 - Questioning

“Gabby,” I said to my brother as we entered our shared room. “I think I’m dating a girl.”
“I thought you were gay. Jamie, you do know that you can’t be gay and have a girlfriend, right?” I rolled my eyes at him and shook my head.
“I can be gay and like her! I mean, she’s so much different than the other girls at our school…” He threw an empty water bottle at my head, and sat on his bed.
“You’ve never talked to any other girls at our school, stupid.” I threw the bottle back at him and groaned.
“Just shut up, Gabriel. She’s different. I really like her.” I sat on my bed and hugged my pillow, sighing heavily.
“That’s the same girl you were using as a cover-up, right?” Sometimes I really want to punch him. He has such a smart mouth and it gets on my nerves! “I don’t like this idea of you dating a girl and being gay. I don’t even think you like her.”
“Whatever, Gabriel.” I mumbled while changing into my night clothes. He was already changed. I got underneath my covers, wanting nothing more than to sleep. He turned the lamp off and in a few minutes, I was asleep.


My eyes opened slowly when I felt heat from the sun on my face. I looked around to see that Gabriel was already up. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, still half asleep. I sighed and stood up; really not wanting to see Gabriel after what he said last night. I mean, how does he know how I feel? It’s not like he felt the kiss we shared. Does he even know what it’s like to like someone? I bet he doesn’t! Okay, I think I’m done ranting. I walk into the kitchen to see my brother eating and my mom fixing my breakfast.
“Good morning Jamie, did you sleep well?” My mom is so nice. Of course she doesn’t know I’m gay. I’m not ready to tell her, but I will tell her about Noelle, my girlfriend. I smiled to myself as I thought about her. Who would have thought me pushing her into a pool and her finding out I was gay would bring us together.
“Yeah, thanks mom.” I went where she was and took my plate and sat down in front of my brother. He stayed silent and so did I. I love my brother, but he’s just so unsociable, and he’s been acting differently around me ever since I told him I was gay. It’s like he thinks I’m going to fall for him. I mean, he is hot because he looks like me, but that’s disgusting. I ate quickly and went back to our room to get dressed.


After going back and forth in my head about calling Noelle, I finally decided I had better call her. I got my phone and the piece of paper with her number on it, and called her.
“Hello?”
“Um, hey Noelle, it’s me Jamie.”
“H-Hey Jamie, what’s up..?”
“I’m just sitting around my house…with nothing to do. I-I was wondering if you wanted to do something…like go to the mall, or get something to eat…or something.”
“Oh! Sure, that would be great.” My heart was pounding by now.
“Okay, I’ll pick you up in maybe thirty minutes?”
“Okay! II-I’ll see you then!”
“I’ll see you then.”
“Bye!”
I hung up my phone and rushed to redo my hair and make sure it looked okay. I’ve never been on a date, and I’m afraid. I had to make sure I was looking good before I left. She might think differently of me if I don’t. I don’t want to mess up this relationship. I hope I can keep my eyes off other guys…

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