Chapter 1 - Untitled

Title: Worst Meal Ever!
By: Natalia “you’ll never catch me coppers!” Fr-you don’t need my last name...



Service at the Sushi Restaurant can be really unreliable at times. Actually, all the time, that is if you eat at the Hokkaido Sushi Emporium. My mom just ordered like, twenty-four minutes ago, and I had already reread the five-paged menu four times. Well, if there was one thing that the restaurant made up for its slow service, it was its atmosphere. The air is as cool as an air-conditioned room, and the smell of the place is almost equivalent to that of a shoe store. You just walk in and , the alluring smell clears your sinuses and leaves you with an almost ‘high’ feeling. Anyway, right now I was in the mood for trying something exotic, so I forced my mom into ordering the fresh Uni, which by the way is Sea Urchin. She told me “No.”, because she didn’t want to take any chances. So I told her, “Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure I’d like. And if I happened to throw it out because it sucked, well, at least it’s not my money I’m throwing away.” Then I gave her a reassuring smile, which obviously didn’t work because she gave me this nasty scowl. Still, she ordered it for me. So we waited an extra fifteen minutes for the incoming meals. Finally, after a long deal of waiting, they came.


First of all, the urchin looked nothing like how the picture on the menu looked. On the menu, the shellfish looked all nice, orange, and not to mention fluffy. But in real life, the thing looked like something passed out from a dog’s rear-end. Nevertheless, being the sinful glutton I am, I still risk eating the bunch of mush. My mom was even giving me nervous sidewise glances while she was beginning her Californian Roll. I would have told her that I don’t like being looked at while I'm eating because it breaks my concentration. But I couldn’t as my mouth was all puckered up. You know how the waitresses are always trying to coax you while flattering themselves by squawking, “Oh try this! It will send your taste buds on a journey!”? It’s either that or, “Try this, it is delicious as heaven!”. HEAVEN MY @$$!


The fish tasted like it was left in the sun to rot for fifteen days, and I swear my tongue shriveled up once I tongued it. The smell should have been enough to tell me that the thing was rancid. I tried not to make a total fuss about it, because all the garcons were staring at me. I was thinking, make yourselves useful and get me some water! They probably were psychics, since they immediately served me three helpings of ice cold water that would hopefully drown out the taste. Instead, it just made me want to use the restroom. It was probably the most disgusting experience I ever had, second to having to clean off that rotten fish from the sidewalk. One thing for sure, I had learned my lesson. And so did my mom, who ended up having to pay for the diabolical thing, as well as eating it for me.



_Based on actual events ^_^_

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