Chapter 0 - The Skit

So don''t forget to always use Brown Paper Bags. Whatever you want, we bag it for you. Do you have any questions or comments about Brown Paper Bags?

"Hey, I don''t cough sometimes, do I get a reward?"

With Brown Paper Bags, you get our "no coughing" finances and no down payments until yesterday. Act now and we''ll hide a toddler in one of your bags."

Are you 13,000 years old?!!"

Brown Paper Bags has been in business since 100,000 BC, and our well-trained managers have little to no experience handling paper products."

Hey, my friend has a problem. We were three miles from a gas station and she decides to go in the middle of this huge field. Is there any way you can help?"

Brown Paper Bags'' newest product, EXTREME THICKNESS BAGS™ can hold up to three gallons of liquid without leaking for four minutes.

"Wow! Thanks, Brown Paper Bags! You have changed my life!"

At Brown Paper Bags, we do all we can to satisfy our customers. Act now and you get a ten minute free trial. If you are not satisfied with your Brown Paper Bag, we will give you someone else''s money back or replace the product.

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