Chapter 1 - Birth of the Alliance

Mortal Kombat: Video Dating Alliance

Chapter 1: Birth of the Alliance.



It was a normal day in Earth realm, where tournament was being held just for the heck of it if you know what I mean? But no one seemed to care about the tournament. They where felling bored of the same thing over and over and over… well you get the idea! Suddenly Raiden materialized to encourage the Earth Defenders.

Raiden: For crying out loud what the hell is wrong with you guys? Where in a Tournament that decides the fate of Earth Realm! You're supposed to be killing each other like the last tournaments…wait a minute… (Raiden began to remember each and every tournament) now that I think about it… this is the only thing we do!

Everyone: NOOO KIIIDIIIIIING!!!

Sonya: Can't we do something else? I mean we all want to enjoy life, right?

Jax: So… what do you have in mind?

Havik: Does it involve CHAOS AND DISSASTER!!! (Said Havik with a pleasurable tone)

Everyone: O.O

Havik: What? It's what I do, so deal with it.

Hotaru: Typical… (Havik began to grumble) I suggest something orderly.

Havik: Who's typical now!!!

Hotaru: Oh shut up!!!

Havik: MAKE ME YOU ORDERLY dog!!!

Hotaru: By the honor of Order and the Seidan Guards I challenge you to MORTAL KOMBAT!!! HAYAAA!!!

Havik: Give me your best shot!!! HAAAAAYYOOOO!!!

Hotaru and Havik began to beat the crap out of each other, meanwhile the others where still thinking on what to do.

Sub-Zero: So…have you thought of anything?

Sonya: Nope…

Johnny Cage: I know! Let's watch all of my movies!!!

Everyone: NO!!!

Johnny Cage: Why do you have to be so mean!!! (Ran away crying)

Raiden: …ok…back to the matter, does anybody has a better idea?

Kitana: Well, since you all know that Liu and I are trying to have a relation; I was wondering if we could take the VDS

Raiden: The what?

Jax: Oh, I heard about that, the Video Dating Service. You make a video about you, for example; Hi my name is Raiden The God of Thunder, I'm 10,000 years old, and my occupation is the guardian of the Earth realm. That kind of stuff, so you send the video to the VDS and they find someone with your same interest and hook you up for a date.

Raiden: Oh, I don't know, I'm too old for dating…

Sonya: Oh come on Raiden, live a little. I mean is not like you're a 10,000-year-old virgin right?

Raiden: …

Sonya: O.O…Raiden?

Raiden: …

Sonya: You can't be…I mean there's no possible way someone can be a…10,000 year old virgin.

Raiden: (Whimpers) IT'S TRUE!! (Crying on Sonya's shoulder) I'm a 10,000-year-old virgin! OH MY GOD! I'M A 10,000 VIRGING! WAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAA!!

Sonya: (Patting on Raiden's back.) There, there. Just let it all out.

Raiden: (Sniff) its not easy being the God of Thunder, (Sniff) Its work all the time…

In a corner to the left…

Scorpion: Man, and here I thought I had it bad.

Sub-Zero: Yeah, and I freeze everything when I'm turned on. But being a 10,000-year-old virgin… (Nods) that's not right… (Both Sub-Zero and Scorpion looks at each other)

S-Z, S: (Smirk) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh Man!

Kitana appears out of nowhere and kick both of then in the balls.

Sub-Zero: (Twitching on the ground) THE PAIN! WHY THE PAIN! (Noticed that Scorpion is on the ground too) I thought spectres didn't felt pain?

Scorpion: When it comes to getting hit on the balls, there is always pain… (Looks at Kitana) AND WHAT WAS THAT FOR?

Kitana: That's for being so cruel.

Raiden: No, they're right. (Sniff) And I decided that in order to fix this virgin problem.

Johnny Cage: 10,000 year old virgin problem!

Raiden: … (Deadly stare)

Johnny Cage: I'm screwed am I?

Raiden: I'm going to give you 5 seconds to run away, and you already lost 3.

Johnny Cage: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! (Runs past the Wu Shi gate)

Raiden: Times up!

Raiden started to waves his arms as he chanted some strange language and the sky grew dark and a thunderstorm began. Suddenly a huge lightning bolt struck and a scream was heard. Yes it was Johnny…

Sonya: Was that…

Raiden: Yes…

Sonya: You didn't…

Raiden: Maybe…

Sonya: (Gulp)

Kabal: Hey I see something, and it's coming this way.

Johnny returned to the Wu Shi academy all burnt up and smoking along with some twitching. He walked up to Raiden.

Johnny Cage: I! (GZZZ) hate! (GZZZZ) you! (Falls unconscious)

Raiden: As I was saying before Johnny interrupted me and got all shocked up, I decided that I'd take Kitana's offer.

Jax: Are you sure?

Raiden: Yes, no more will anybody call me a virgin!

Johnny Cage: 10,000 year old virgin!

Raiden: Will you SHUT UP! (Shock's him again)

Johnny: … (Twitching)

Bo Rai Cho: I think his dead!

Raiden: Really!

Bo Rai Cho: Well for starters, he's foaming through the mouth!

Raiden: Oh! Can someone bring me a mop?

Bo Rai Cho: A mop? Why do you want a mop?

Raiden: To clean the foam off the floor before somebody slips. For example, Liu! Can you come here for a second?

Liu Kang: Yeah, what do (Slips) WOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (CRASH)

Raiden: …like that…

Bo Rai Cho: Oh! I see.

Kitana: OH MY GOD! (Rushes to Liu Kang's side) Speak to me! SAY SOMETHING!!

Liu Kang: Clean up on aisle 5…Uuhg! (Falls unconscious)

Kinata: (Darth Vader voice tone) NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Raiden: Ooook, those two won't be joining us, so who will?

Jax: I'm in.

Sonya: So am I.

Sub-Zero: Raiden losing his 10,000-year-old virgin! This is something I got to see.

Scorpion: Yeah, there is something worth watching.

Johnny: Count me in! (Still lying on the ground)

Raiden: Weren't you supposed to be dead?

Johnny: So did I, guess I was knock out. Lucky me huh!

Raiden: Yeah…lucky…you… So who else is coming?

Mileena: I could use some loving.

Kenshi: I may be blind but I still can love.

Cirax, Smoke, Sektor: I guess its time for the SEX-MACHINES to join the party.

Kira: I got nothing else to do.

Sindel: Jade and I got nothing else to do.

Jade: True, so Nitara, Li Mei, Tanya, Frost, Ashrah. Are you coming?

N, LM, T, F, A: Yeah, sure, ok, I don't see any harm, fine by me.

Shujinko: I may be old, but I still got some spunk!

Raiden: So it's decided.

Sonya: Aren't you forgetting something?

Raiden: Am I?

Sonya points at Havik and Hotaru. Yes, they've been fighting this whole time. How? Hey it's a Mortal Kombat thing.

Raiden: Those two, (Raiden walks up to them) How about you two?

Said Raiden to Havik and Hotaru, but they didn't listened to him since they are fighting. Raiden: Hellloooo, I am talking to both of you!! (Still not listening) I SAID DO BOTH OF YOU AGREEED!!! (Shock both of them with a hell of a lighting bolt)

Havik, Hotaru: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Everyone: 0.0 OOOOOOH!!!!

Johnny Cage: (Still lying on the ground) that's got to hurt! I know! I had experience!

Both of them lied on the ground burnt and twitching.

Havik, Hotaru: Yes, we agree, just stop it with the shocking and the pain!

Raiden: And so the Video Dating Alliance is born. (Heroic music)

Sonya: Ok…now that we fixed that, where can we get a video camera?

Johnny Cage: (Got up in a heartbeat) OH! I know!

Raiden: Were doomed…

Johnny Cage: We'll go to my studio; there are a lot of cameras in there.

Raiden: Did I ever tell you how much I love you!

Back at Johnny movie studio:

Raiden: Did I ever tell you how much I hate you!

Johnny: (Tied to a pole) I didn't know they closed down my studio! Please don't shock me any more!

Raiden: (Looks at the rest of the gang) Ok, plan B.

Will the MK Gang find a Video Camera and some tapes to send to the VDS? Will Raiden lose his 10,000-year-old virginity? Will Johnny continue to be an idiot and get shocked again? How the heck should I know? Just stay toned for the next Mortal Kombat: Video Dating Alliance.

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