Chapter 2 - Little Red Riding Hood

Once Upon A Time...

Disclaimer: Do NOT own Soul Calibur. Nuriko btw is me so I own her!!! ^_^

Little Red Riding Hood
Note: Because I wanna make it a bit more random, I made Red Riding Hood have a Grandpa instead of a Grandma and guess who the lucky fella is... Lol

CAST:
Red Riding Hood: Cassandra
Wolf: Yunsung
Grandpa: Heihachi
Hunter: Maxi
Narrator: Nuriko

<Backstage>

NURIKO: Okay people we're starting in ten minutes!
HEIHACHI: Hey I just read the real story of Red Riding Hood and it says here that the young girl has a GrandMOTHER... I'm a man!
NURIKO: Yeah well there aren't any old ladies to play the part on Soul Calibur...
HEIHACHI: I see one right now... <eyeballs Ivy>
IVY: What did you say you old man?!?!?! <brings out Valentine Blade> (or was it Ivy Blade? Soz can't remember!)
HEIHACHI: Nothing!!!! <runs off>
YUNSUNG: <smirks> Why's Ivy getting mad? She IS old!
NURIKO: <sighs> Ok people get ready! Ivy leave him alone! You can get him back later! Where's my Red Riding Hood?

<Curtains go up>

CASSANDRA: I uh forgot to mention something Nuriko...
NURIKO: Whatever it is I'm sure it can wait cuz you're up now! <pushes Cassandra out>
CASSANDRA: <freezes>
NURIKO: <THOUGHTS: OMG!!! STAGE FRIGHT?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Damn gotta do something!> <uses Psychic powers to call Sophitia> Once upon a time, there lived a young girl named Little Red Riding Hood.
CASSANDRA: ...... Uh.... Uh.... <sees Sophitia from corner of eye whispering her lines> Oh yes I am off to see my Granny...dad I mean! Yes with my basket of goodies! <hops off>
NURIKO: Whilst in the woods, Red Riding Hood meets up with the conniving wolf who lives there, wandering around in search of food...
YUNSUNG: <comes out in wolf outfit> I see a little girl with a basket of goodies! Maybe I should steal it off her. After all I'm the master at stealing stuff, considering the fact that I stole Seung Mina's dad's White Storm...
NURIKO: Stick to the story!
YUNSUNG: Can't I even brag about how I did great???
NURIKO: No!
YUNSUNG: <glares at her>

<Audience>

SEUNG MINA: Man I am sooooo gonna get him back...
KILIK: Wow you're pissed aren't you?
SEUNG MINA: <with dark aura around her> Whatever gave you that idea Kilik?
KILIK: Ahahahaha.... Hm...
XIANGHUA: Leave Kilik-chan alone! It's not his fault that he's a bit dim!
KILIK: Uh you do know that I'm here right?
XIANGHUA: Shut up Kilik! I'm defending you!
KILIK: By mocking me???
XIANGHUA: It's not mocking, it's the truth! You ARE a bit dim...
KILIK: Well in that case; you're a bit fat! Wait, not a bit... You're VERY fat!
XIANGHUA: <gasps> How dare you....
SEUNG MINA: ......???? <ignores the arguing couple>

<Meanwhile...>

YUNSUNG: Hey lil girl! What's your name? Can I have those goodies?
CASSANDRA: Hi! Cassandra... I mean Red Riding Hood and no you can't have these goodies! They're for my grandad...
YUNSUNG: How's about you give em to me and I'll give em to your grandad?
CASSANDRA: Hm... Ok! <Hands basket over>
NURIKO: <Whispers but it's so loud everyone can hear> No you dim wit!!! You don't give it to him!!! Don't you read the script that I took forever to write?!?!?!?!
CASSANDRA: Oh right! <takes basket away> I...I'm sorry but I can't give it to you... <walks off>
YUNSUNG: Dammit... I'm starving and she looks good to eat! I know! I'll go to her grandad's place! <runs off>

<At Grandad's place>

NURIKO: Go on!!!
HEIHACHI: I REFUSE to go on looking like this!
NURIKO: Well too bad! You agreed to it so go on!
HEIHACHI: Only because you said you'd pay me!
NURIKO: I will! After the show! Now GO ON!!! <pushes him out>
HEIHACHI: <comes out and dressed in an old-fashioned nightgown>
AUDIENCE: <stares for a moment before cracking up>
HEIHACHI: ........ Shut up!
NURIKO: But anyway, Grandad was just about to take a nap when he hears a knock on the door.
YUNSUNG: <bangs on door>
HEIHACHI: Who's there???
YUNSUNG: <in his normal voice> It's me... Little Red Riding Hood...
HEIHACHI: ???? You're not my grandchild! You sound like an old man!
YUNSUNG: <THOUGHTS: Takes one to know one... Stupid fool> I uh... <voice goes squeaky> Puberty!
CASSANDRA: <from backstage> Do I really sound like that?
HEIHACHI: I still doubt that you're my grandchild...
YUNSUNG: Then I'll huff, and I'll puff and I'll...
NURIKO: Wrong story!!!
YUNSUNG: I mean... <opens door and pounces on Heihachi>

<Curtains go down for a few minutes, shuffling can be heard and curtains rise again... Yunsung is now in the wolf costume AND the nightgown>

AUDIENCE: <cracks up even more>
YUNSUNG: Shut up!
NURIKO: Well, with Heiha... I mean Red Riding Hood's Grandad outcold in the cupboard, poor Red Riding Hood is unaware of the danger that lurks in her own Grandad's house.
CASSANDRA: <goes up to house and knocks on door>
YUNSUNG: <hides snout under covers> Who is it?
CASSANDRA: It's me, Grandad! Can I come in.
YUNSUNG: Why of course!
CASSANDRA: <comes in and stares at her supposedly Grandad>
YUNSUNG: What?
CASSANDRA: My my Grandad what big ears you have!
YUNSUNG: All the better to hear you with my dear!
CASSANDRA: Wow Grandad what big eyes you have!
HEIHACHI: Are you saying I have tiny eyes?!?!?!
EVERYONE: ........................................
YUNSUNG: Uh... All the better to see you with... Ahahahaha <snout comes out from under covers>
CASSANDRA: Grandad! What big teeth you have!
YUNSUNG: All the better to eat you with! <stands up and roars>
CASSANDRA, CHILDREN IN THE AUDIENCE AND KILIK: <scream>
CASSANDRA: <runs out of the house with Yunsung right behind her> Help help!!!
MAXI: <turns around and sees Cassandra running past him> ??? <sees Yunsung> Holy shoot! <"kills" Yunsung with his nunchaku>
CASSANDRA: Oh you saved me!
MAXI: No need to thank me...
NURIKO: Thanks to the hunter, the wolf is dead and Red Riding Hood and her Grandad are save and they lived happily ever after. The End.

<Backstage>

NURIKO: Great work you guys!
MAXI: Was that all I had to do?!?!?!?!
NURIKO: Uh yup... That's also why I let you use your Nunchaku instead of a gun, which you were supposed to do...
TALIM: Yunsung-kun! <runs over to him>
YUNSUNG: That's it! I'm done!
NURIKO: Sure you are...
YUNSUNG: -_-;;;;;; It's not the end is it?
NURIKO: <shrugs>

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