Chapter 1 - Default

What If Muffy Acted LikeA Valley Girl?

Arthur is Copyright Marc Brown

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Muffy was watching the Alicia Silverstone movie Clueless, she was seeing how the teenagers would be the tops in popularity, and fashion and saying stuff like, “As If,” Muffy was inspired by that movie, of course she wanted to become a valley girl but when she researched it, her mother wouldn't let her bleach her hair blond. “At least I can say `as if' and other valley girl slang's to people but I need to do some shopping.”

Before Muffy left she painted her nails and went shopping, she went to buy some pre-teen clothes since she wanted to emulate the girls on Clueless.

At school she put the slang's into effect she bumped into Buster.

“Like Buster, get out of the way,” Muffy said rudely.

“What?” Buster asked

“Like oh my gawd!” Muffy exclaimed.

“Huh?” Buster asked.

“As If!” Muffy exclaimed and walked away.

“I didn't understand a word she said,” Buster said as he was talking to Fern.

Francine was talking to Muffy “Like oh my gawd Buster is so dumb, I asked him to get like out of the way and he just stood there like confused and stuff, what a dweeb.”

“Well Buster isn't very smart,” Francine replied.

“Like duh,” Muffy replied, “It's like he should like be put in a remedial class or something”

“I am not sure of that…” Francine replied

“You are totally right, he just needs to like understand what I am talking about,” Muffy replied.

“I see…” Francine was getting confused, “I hear there is a new Judo Kitten movie out.”

“Like duh, that's totally old news,” Muffy replied, “I am fer sure that that movie will be good.”

Mr. Ratburn walked into the classroom. “Ok students we are having a pop quiz,”

“Like oh my gawd I forgot to study!” Muffy said to herself worryingly, “I shouldn't have like watched that movie.”

A few hours later Mr. Ratburn handed back Muffy's test.

“Ms. Crosswire is there anything you would like to say about this C?” Mr. Ratburn asked curiously.

“Uh Hello, I studied,” Muffy replied, “I like studied.”

“You got a C, “Mr. Ratburn replied, “I will let you take the test again, provided that you study.”

Muffy went to the cafeteria and it was meat loaf for lunch, “ugh eww.” Muffy looked at the stringy meatloaf, “That's groady to the max.”

The Brain, Arthur, George and Fern watched Muffy.

“What's with Muffy?” The Brain asked.

“She has been acting very weird,” Arthur replied.

“She has been talking very weird too,” Sue Ellen added.

“Muffy said something like, `as if,' to Buster,” Fern said.

“And she called me a dweeb,” George replied.

“I think we should research this,” The Brain asked, “She is acting pretty strange; I don't want it to spread to us either.”

The Brain and Company went to their parents to see what was wrong with Muffy started with Arthur's parents.

“Mom Muffy is acting weird,” Arthur complained.

“What is she doing?” Mrs. Read asked

“She is starting a sentence with the word `like',” Arthur replied.

“I think you should talk to Muffy's parents I am not touching this topic with a 10 foot pole,” Mrs. Read replied.

“How about my parents?” Sue Ellen asked.

“Your mom might now,” Arthur replied.

They went to Sue Ellen's.

“Muffy is saying `like' at the beginning of every sentence,” Sue Ellen explained.

“Is she saying it like, `like oh my gawd!'?” Mrs. Armstrong asked.

Sue Ellen and her friends were totally shocked.

“…Yes,” Sue Ellen said quietly.

“I can say if she is turning into what I don't really want to say but she is turning into a valley girl, or she just watched Clueless,” Mrs. Armstrong explained.

“I am saying she watched this clueless film,” Arthur replied.

The next day at school Muffy dressed like a valley girl as she did buy new clothes the other day, she continued talking like a valley girl.

“Class today we will be pairing up in groups for a science report, Muffy Crosswire you are going to pair up with Binky Barnes,” Mr. Ratburn said.

“As if, he is like totally a clumsy oaf!” Muffy explained.

Fern covered her eyes, “She is going to get it.”

“Muffy may I see you after class?” Mr. Ratburn asked.

“…Yes,” Muffy said nervously.

After class Mr. Ratburn gave Muffy a talking to.

“Muffy, I think you should curb your uh, your way of talking and dressing right now, it was normal when you were dressing in that lavender dress but now you are wearing lipstick and painting your nails and dressing like a… ahem never mind,” Mr. Ratburn said he didn't want to get in trouble for calling a student a bad name, “I guess we should go to the principals office.”

Muffy was never sent to the principal's office before, she saw other students go but she was nervous.

“Mr. Haney, I am having a problem with Muffy,” Mr. Ratburn said, “She is dressing like a pre-teen and talking like a…,” Mr. Ratburn sighs, “A valley girl.”

Muffy walks in saying, “As If,” to Arthur, then she says to Fern, “Don't go there girlfriend.”

“Ms. Crosswire, I don't know what you are doing but it needs to stop now before the worst happens, you are acting older than you are,” Mr. Haney said, “You are not doing the best thing.”

“Like what are you talking about Mr. Haney?” Muffy asked.

“I think I should call your parents,” Mr. Haney replied.

Mr. and Mrs. Crosswire arrived minutes later.

“Mr. and Mrs. Crosswire, I want to talk to you both about Muffy's behavior at school,” Mr. Haney explained.

“What's wrong?” Mr. Crosswire asked.

“I have been researching her behavior and she has been acting like a `valley girl',” Mr. Haney explained nervously, “I want to know if she has been watching any movies that is making her exhibit this sort of behavior.”

“Well her cousin came by with movies like Clueless, Legally Blonde the sequel of it, and Valley Girl,” Mrs. Crosswire explained.

“Those movies are not rated PG, she shouldn't emulate what she sees in those movies what happens when she is a teenager?” Mr. Ratburn asked.

Fantasy Scene.

`Censored'

End Fantasy Scene.

“I see, we will try and make sure she is raised right by making her watch movies that we approve of,” Mrs. Crosswire explained.

After school Mr. and Mrs. Crosswire talked to Muffy about the type of slang they used in those movies and they made her watch a movie rated PG.

“As if, like I will ever watch that,” Muffy exclaimed.

“You will watch those movies and you will like it and you will speak proper instead of this valley girl garbage you got going,” Mrs. Crosswire explained sternly.

After several hours of watching movies that weren't to Muffy's liking she went to bed.

The next day Muffy was still acting like a valley girl but it wasn't so much obvious the `detoxification' process was working slowly but surely.

The End.

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