Chapter 2 - revenge

ENVY



Once upon a time Envy wanted revenge, mostly on the pony who had caused all his problems, but partially on Greed and Lust.



Greed because he publicized the pony incident, and Lust because the sweater was bright and happy, and made him feel sick. He also wanted revenge on Wrath, but that was for another reason entirely, that was because of the snakeskin pants incident.



Greed had also been involved in the snakeskin pants incident, as well as Roy and Hughes. But they didn't like to talk about it.





But at the moment Envy was focused on killing that pony. He was only a little sidetracked by Lust's happy sweater. So Envy pulled out his sword, which he had named "Barbie", and ran after Wrath's pony. After running for three hours Envy realized he wasn't getting anywhere. So he stopped.



And he waited.



And waited.



And waited.



Until the fairly stupid pony walked over to him, and that was the end of that. Almost. He still had to deal with Greed and Lust.





LUST





Lust loved her pretty pink and orange sweater. So much in fact that she vowed never to take it off! Unless she was in the shower, that was an exception that had to be made for her health. But then again she reasoned, she couldn't actually die...



So she wore the sweater non-stop for three years (that's three years without her showering) until Sloth told her exactly what she smelt like. After Lust had finished throwing up, she went to take a shower.



That night was the first, last, and only night Envy volunteered to do the laundry.



"Be careful with my sweater!" Lust yelled as Envy went to wash it. There was the sound of evil laughter, and then the horrible sound of a paper shredder with clothing in it. Lust started to cry and Envy began to laugh again.



GREED





Greed hated Envy, and that was OK because Envy hated him back. And as long as they both remembered that all was right with the world. Occasionally one (or both) of them would forget about the mutual hatred and they would have weird days.



Other times they would remember how much they hated each other and exactly why they hated each other, and they would do ... strange un-natural things. Or at least that's how Sloth explained it to Wrath.



Her exact words had been: "When two people hate each other like Greed and Envy, they find it necessary to express this anger in strange and un-natural ways. Not that it's normally un-natural, but with Greed and Envy nothing is normal."



And with that Sloth had quickly changed the subject.



Envy didn't really have a plan for making Greed suffer, and to be honest, he didn't really need one. All he had to do was wait. Like with the pony. Envy didn't have to wait long, partially because Greed was predictable, but mostly because Envy had been calling for him for the past twenty minutes.



As Greed walked into the room Envy simply tripped him and walked out proudly. Leaving Greed lying on the ground, wondering why Envy had decided to walk out instead of gloating. The truth was Envy had won that time, and nothing more needed to be said.



WRATH





Wrath wasn't quite sure what Sloth had meant by un-natural things, but he did know it involved peanut butter. Lots of peanut butter. And so Wrath decided that Greed and Envy had found a way to turn peanut butter evil, or at least “un-natural”.



It made him mad that they used up all the peanut butter in the house at least once every two months. And so now it was Wrath's turn to begin to plot revenge.



PRIDE





The one thing Pride loved more than watermelon was pineapples, and the only thing he loved more than that was being in charge. Mostly he enjoyed being in charge of the military, and all the random people who had chosen to (or had been forced or tricked into) working there.



So one day he decided to combine his three true loves.



He handed out pineapples and watermelons to everyone he ran into.





“What the hell?!” Roy yelled.



“What am I supposed to do with this??” He got nothing but blank stares from everyone else in the room. Roy sighed, and handed his watermelon to Havoc, who was holding a pineapple.



“What makes you think I want this?” Havoc asked the colonel.



Roy just stared at him and said, “If you don't take it your fired.”



Havoc sighed and began to make fruit salad.







SLOTH



Sloth was not in a good mood the day pride handed out fruit. She had spent her weekend in several not-so-nice places. First Lust had tricked her into turning into water, within a matter of minutes she found herself in the freezer, with fruit flavoring dumped onto her.



Then Lust sold her for $3.50 as a really big Popsicle. Sloth had spent the rest of the weekend contemplating the meaning of the phrase `Crack is Wack'. While she explored the human digestive system. She also explored the sewage system.



Sloth was really pissed so she joined up with Wrath in his random revenge thing he was plotting against everyone.







GLUTTONY



Gluttony and Scar teamed up and stole Havoc's fruit salad, and all of Prides fruit, and there was much rejoicing, yay.



THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS



None of them can dance, it's actually kind of funny, in a pathetic way.

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