Chapter 1 - Rambling!

Granny's story time!!

Once upon a time there was a cow with a fishnet under his big toe and his head lice never ate it. Why you ask? Because he was a salesman and salesmen do NOT like milk that is unflavored. Flavored milk is like my grandma's favorite thing to talk about along with her spinach corn rag dolls. Oh and don't get her started on clarinets...

So anyways the cow went to Madagascar because that is a place that many people have heard of and its name had a certain ring to it at the time when the cow decided to go there. So he went to Madagascar.

And let me tell you, that place is HUMID. It reminds me of the time my monkey's lawyer's brother's friend's father's college roommate's banker's sister went there to find her lost laundry. She never did like tofu...


ANYWAYS so the cow wanted to find some corned hark, and don't ask me what that is... It reminds me of haggis. That stuff is really gross you know? My uncle once told me that haggis was the answer to all of the riddles on his potluck quiz... I wonder what motivated him to shift his fat butt to do that.

OK anyways the cow went to a market and this lady with only three teeth talked to the cow. Man three teeth? Isn’t that funny... I heard of some guy who had eight teeth but three? Why wouldn't his grandmother just buy him some? What about weasles? Wait... what was I talking about?

Oh yes, so the lady told the cow that if he wanted to find a wizard he would have to find the rump roast of Nottingham. What? Don't ask me why! I don't know where the bathroom is! Why aren't you listening! Well I never! You should learn to respect your elders, young-un! Why I- WHAT? No! Just shut up!

Anyways so the wizard ate the cow and-WHAT NOW? Oh fine, go then! Sheesh...
*flush* Well anyways... wait... *hack* *cough* sonny? What was I talking about?

Huh?

What?

Merhhah?

HARRUMPH!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.......


the end.

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