Chapter 1 - My Heart

It's the only thing I can do,
just to stay alive inside.
I know that after all I've been through,
that it's better for me just to hide,
in my forever aching heart.

I feel like I'm in the dark,
meant to live in a motionless state.
Kicking and clawing in the bark,
on this tree meant to be my fate,
in my forever aching heart.

Trying not to cry like I could.
Keeping myself from living though,
this chaotic life like I should.
Why couldn't it be true,
in my forever aching heart?

Because of these burns,
I fear of going on.
I'm tired of taking turns,
on this roller coaster I've begun,
in my forever aching heart

All these lies of loving me,
saying I was like the world.
That I was pretty, beautiful, the most I could ever be.
I ever waited watching my life as it hurled,
in my forever aching heart.

To him I was just a tool,
he used me for his selfish needs.
He humiliated me, broke me, made me a fool,
as if I would take part in his game of greed.
In my forever aching heart.

Once I heard him say so bold,
"she has no clue, that girl,
that I'm going to take her and leave her in the cold."
I knew I had to escape or else my life would twist and twirl,
in my forever aching heart.

I packed my bag and gathered my things,
but not before he noticed me.
He grabbed my arm and I screamed for I knew not what the future would bring.
He dragged me out to his car and told me I would soon be free,
in my forever aching heart.

I asked and pleaded for him to let go,
he looked at me with his cold eyes.
He looked away to the road and kept driving through the snow.
I never knew of these kind of guys,
In my forever aching heart.

He suddenly stopped and opened the door,
He grabbed my arm once again and pulled me out of the car.
I pleaded and pleaded more and more,
but he was in a world afar,
in my forever aching heart.

I just came along with him shivering from the cold,
or could've been from fear, I'll never really know.
'All you should fear is fear itself' I've been told,
but this is a fear all on it's own,
in my forever aching heart.

He took me too a building, one I've never seen,
it was so beautiful it could've made me cry.
If I hadn't already been,
crying and crying but not knowing why,
in my forever aching heart.

He left the room and there was a loud noise,
he had left me there alone on the little couch.
To leave or to stay, it was now my choice,
I stayed to to see what he had done,he came back with a pouch,
in my forever aching heart.

He put a hand in and it came out with a click,
his hand holding a gun.
He held it in his his head making it slow but quick,
pulling the trigger, he fell to the ground looking towards the sun,
in my forever aching heart.

It's was all over now, he could now be in peace,
but it was only the beginning of a new end.
I took the gun pulled the trigger waiting for my heart beat to cease,
but it only meant another life around the bend.
In my no longer aching heart...

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