IZ: Sober
Blog Entry: IZ: Sober
Blog Entry: IZ: Sober
It's hard to believe just..what happened - the shattered life we all have now. That is, if it can be called a life.. The day didn't really start off unusual... actually, it started off so great. Perhaps, I should start at the beginning... Or, rather the middle. I can't talk about what happened before the accidentl it will make the pain so much worse.
The four of us had just come back from a day at the park - a day I don't think any of us believe it ever happened at all. The smeets were exhausted; GIR was begging me to pick him up so he could sleep in my arms for the walk back. I said no, of course... Irk...why..why</i> did I say no? I may have been able to save him if he was tucked securely in my arms, but no! I had to - had to... None of that matters now, and he's not my biggest concern.
We were laughing and talking; Dib was still wiping remnants of potato salad from his hair, courtesy from me of course. It was getting darker; the earth sun barely peeking out from the hill, but it was still light enough that someone would see where they were going...if they were "sober". It happened in three quick steps: a scream; a light; a shove and then nothing more..
GIR was bleeding from the head, face and arms, but he was conscious and not in as critical condition. Talia was bleeding so bad...I couldn't even tell where most of the blood was coming from. And Dib - he had taken the blow after he shoved me to the ground... I was not sure where the cuts and gashes began and ended; he was a human cantelope. A face was barely recognizable in the blood as well.
Irk, what happened? How could anything</i> happen that</i> fast - that sudden - when only moments before, life was perfect? Could I say that perhaps the first time in my life, life was happy? I was....happy? No, it indeed was not the life I dreamed of; that life I left long ago. Surely, I never expected that I would want</i> to stay on earth with the humans, or that I'd choose to reside in a small condo with my old enemy and help raise two children - counting GIR. We were all at peace, genreally a happy..family.</i> Even the Dib and I seemed to have gradually stop hating each other. We were.. could it be called allies..or actual friends?</i> And a fate decided with a glass bottle.
There wasn't much I could do - I didn't know what</i> to do. I grabbed Talia and GIR, and tried to pick you up as well.. We were far from the hospital; even far from a payphone. Luckily, my pak had video call, so I simply called the hospital right away. They told me they'd be there immediately, but it wasn't fast enough. I sat there on the side of the road with the toddler's head in my lap, and yours as well. Strange...ever since I came to earth, I wanted to kill you - to see you bleed. Your blood was soaking my pants and boots, and despite how much blood I saw in my times on irk - it scared me more than anything. I do not think I wanted you to bleed anymore... I tried to stop the blood by tying our picnic blanket around some wounds, but it didn't do much good; you were sliced to the bone pretty much everywhere.
When the ambulance finally did arrive, they took one look and came out with a body bag, sure you were dead. My heart was about to shatter until I took your pulse and told them you were still alive. I struggled to hide Talia from view, and GIR as well. I was torn between jumping in the ambulance with you, and going to tend to the kids. I knew I had to go back to the Condo: the paremedica and doctors could take care of you, but Talia and GIR may have died if I left them at the condo...
I worked on Talia until she was at least in stable condition. She couldn't open her eyes, speak, or breathe on her own.. GIR had a few severed "vein" wires inside that I easily fixed to stop the oil leakage, then I tended to a few "bone" wires. He wasn't well, but he wasn't really in peril; I knew he'd survive, but wasn't entirely sure about Talia, and had huge doubts about you.. They wouldn't let me see you at first, afraid I couldn't take it, and I almost couldn't when I saw you..or what was left of you.
Irk! Why, Dib, WHY?! You stupid human - why'd you jump in front of me? You were a smeet! You had a future - you were just a child - fourteen or not! Why did you save me?! Why couldn't you had left me to die! Why! I hate you! I hate you for leaving me!!</i>
If there is any goodness that could possibly come from such a tragedy, it is that GIR and I have never been closer.. He really is the only tiny ray of hope left in my life, and the only one keeping me somewhat sane. I have become so unbelievably protective of him that I won't let him stray out of my sight for merely two minutes. Even when we're in the same house. He does not sleep on his own, even if he knows I'm coming to bed within only an hour, he still won't stay there. I let him stay up with me until I finally reside in sleep - whenever that is.
But there was however one time when GIR decided to literally scare the living daylights out of me. Since Dib's death, GIR doesn't really do too much anymoer - like me. He doesn't go outside whenever I do let him, so I really didn't expect what he decided to pull one night. It was around ten o'clock and I hadn't seen him for over ten minutes. Pathetic, I know, but I said I grew so much more protective over him.. I was hysterical, nearly, running to exactly where I knew he would be - half hour away run to the park.
Indeed, I found him staring listlessly at the tree Dib was killed on; so much blood in the ground.. Words couldn't describe what I felt: anger, pain, relief, sadness, fear... Pretty much everything. I said nothing to him, only pulling the SIR unit over my lap. Spoon or no spoon, it was definitely the hardest and longest punishment GIR had ever gotten.
He layed limp, sobbing heavily over my lap; his bum bright red, though I'm not even sure if that was relevamt to why he was crying.
"Wh-what were you thinking, GIR?!" I clutched the fabric to his yellow shirt. (He was in his human disguise at the time.) "To - to run off in the middle of the night-" my voice broke and my face contorted in anguish, "-and here of all places!" I placed a gentle hand on his back, trying to make him at least acknowledge the fact I was there. "What were you trying to accomplish?"
He only continued to sob; his continuously squirming little legs hinting that indeed he felt his spanking.
My voice was not in the least harsh as I carefully sat him up against me, leaning in to look at his face. "Well....?" It seemed to take forever until I could faintly make out in those heartwrenching sobs, a barely audible "I don't know.."
"H....he's gone. GIR.. They both are." I turned him so he had to fave me, although he was still covering has face. "It is just us now...and.." Irk. no, I wouldn't cry. "I'm not losing you too."
He sucked on his fist, shaking and shifting from the uncomfortable soreness in his rear, tears falling from his face rapidly. "D-Dib," he sobbed, "Talia.."
I quietly pulled his bottoms back up and clutched him to my chest as we walked back to the Condo, all the while, speaking soothingly to him, though trying to calm myself more than he. I turned off the lights, still holding GIR to me, and pulled back the covers to what was now our bed. I turned off his holigram disguise, and tried to sleep, as did he, but ultimately we both woke up after a gruesome nightmare.
The four of us had just come back from a day at the park - a day I don't think any of us believe it ever happened at all. The smeets were exhausted; GIR was begging me to pick him up so he could sleep in my arms for the walk back. I said no, of course... Irk...why..why</i> did I say no? I may have been able to save him if he was tucked securely in my arms, but no! I had to - had to... None of that matters now, and he's not my biggest concern.
We were laughing and talking; Dib was still wiping remnants of potato salad from his hair, courtesy from me of course. It was getting darker; the earth sun barely peeking out from the hill, but it was still light enough that someone would see where they were going...if they were "sober". It happened in three quick steps: a scream; a light; a shove and then nothing more..
GIR was bleeding from the head, face and arms, but he was conscious and not in as critical condition. Talia was bleeding so bad...I couldn't even tell where most of the blood was coming from. And Dib - he had taken the blow after he shoved me to the ground... I was not sure where the cuts and gashes began and ended; he was a human cantelope. A face was barely recognizable in the blood as well.
Irk, what happened? How could anything</i> happen that</i> fast - that sudden - when only moments before, life was perfect? Could I say that perhaps the first time in my life, life was happy? I was....happy? No, it indeed was not the life I dreamed of; that life I left long ago. Surely, I never expected that I would want</i> to stay on earth with the humans, or that I'd choose to reside in a small condo with my old enemy and help raise two children - counting GIR. We were all at peace, genreally a happy..family.</i> Even the Dib and I seemed to have gradually stop hating each other. We were.. could it be called allies..or actual friends?</i> And a fate decided with a glass bottle.
There wasn't much I could do - I didn't know what</i> to do. I grabbed Talia and GIR, and tried to pick you up as well.. We were far from the hospital; even far from a payphone. Luckily, my pak had video call, so I simply called the hospital right away. They told me they'd be there immediately, but it wasn't fast enough. I sat there on the side of the road with the toddler's head in my lap, and yours as well. Strange...ever since I came to earth, I wanted to kill you - to see you bleed. Your blood was soaking my pants and boots, and despite how much blood I saw in my times on irk - it scared me more than anything. I do not think I wanted you to bleed anymore... I tried to stop the blood by tying our picnic blanket around some wounds, but it didn't do much good; you were sliced to the bone pretty much everywhere.
When the ambulance finally did arrive, they took one look and came out with a body bag, sure you were dead. My heart was about to shatter until I took your pulse and told them you were still alive. I struggled to hide Talia from view, and GIR as well. I was torn between jumping in the ambulance with you, and going to tend to the kids. I knew I had to go back to the Condo: the paremedica and doctors could take care of you, but Talia and GIR may have died if I left them at the condo...
I worked on Talia until she was at least in stable condition. She couldn't open her eyes, speak, or breathe on her own.. GIR had a few severed "vein" wires inside that I easily fixed to stop the oil leakage, then I tended to a few "bone" wires. He wasn't well, but he wasn't really in peril; I knew he'd survive, but wasn't entirely sure about Talia, and had huge doubts about you.. They wouldn't let me see you at first, afraid I couldn't take it, and I almost couldn't when I saw you..or what was left of you.
Irk! Why, Dib, WHY?! You stupid human - why'd you jump in front of me? You were a smeet! You had a future - you were just a child - fourteen or not! Why did you save me?! Why couldn't you had left me to die! Why! I hate you! I hate you for leaving me!!</i>
If there is any goodness that could possibly come from such a tragedy, it is that GIR and I have never been closer.. He really is the only tiny ray of hope left in my life, and the only one keeping me somewhat sane. I have become so unbelievably protective of him that I won't let him stray out of my sight for merely two minutes. Even when we're in the same house. He does not sleep on his own, even if he knows I'm coming to bed within only an hour, he still won't stay there. I let him stay up with me until I finally reside in sleep - whenever that is.
But there was however one time when GIR decided to literally scare the living daylights out of me. Since Dib's death, GIR doesn't really do too much anymoer - like me. He doesn't go outside whenever I do let him, so I really didn't expect what he decided to pull one night. It was around ten o'clock and I hadn't seen him for over ten minutes. Pathetic, I know, but I said I grew so much more protective over him.. I was hysterical, nearly, running to exactly where I knew he would be - half hour away run to the park.
Indeed, I found him staring listlessly at the tree Dib was killed on; so much blood in the ground.. Words couldn't describe what I felt: anger, pain, relief, sadness, fear... Pretty much everything. I said nothing to him, only pulling the SIR unit over my lap. Spoon or no spoon, it was definitely the hardest and longest punishment GIR had ever gotten.
He layed limp, sobbing heavily over my lap; his bum bright red, though I'm not even sure if that was relevamt to why he was crying.
"Wh-what were you thinking, GIR?!" I clutched the fabric to his yellow shirt. (He was in his human disguise at the time.) "To - to run off in the middle of the night-" my voice broke and my face contorted in anguish, "-and here of all places!" I placed a gentle hand on his back, trying to make him at least acknowledge the fact I was there. "What were you trying to accomplish?"
He only continued to sob; his continuously squirming little legs hinting that indeed he felt his spanking.
My voice was not in the least harsh as I carefully sat him up against me, leaning in to look at his face. "Well....?" It seemed to take forever until I could faintly make out in those heartwrenching sobs, a barely audible "I don't know.."
"H....he's gone. GIR.. They both are." I turned him so he had to fave me, although he was still covering has face. "It is just us now...and.." Irk. no, I wouldn't cry. "I'm not losing you too."
He sucked on his fist, shaking and shifting from the uncomfortable soreness in his rear, tears falling from his face rapidly. "D-Dib," he sobbed, "Talia.."
I quietly pulled his bottoms back up and clutched him to my chest as we walked back to the Condo, all the while, speaking soothingly to him, though trying to calm myself more than he. I turned off the lights, still holding GIR to me, and pulled back the covers to what was now our bed. I turned off his holigram disguise, and tried to sleep, as did he, but ultimately we both woke up after a gruesome nightmare.