Chapter 20 - The Battlefield experience… Part one…

The Battlefield experience… Part one…



( Part one of two )



Saturday morning… Breakfast time… ^-^



Shadow: *yawns* Morning…
Rouge: COFFEE!!! COFFEE!!!
Shadow: *slaps Rouge*
Knuckles: She says good morning…
Shadow: Aah…
Sonic: Hey has anyone seen the marmalade…?
All: O_o
Blain: That is so sick man…
Knuckles: Disgusting!
Rouge: Coffee…? Knuckles: No, we’re out of peanut butter…
Rouge: Coffee… -_-
Shadow: Remind me to throw the coffee maker through the window… -_-‘
Rouge: COFFEE!!!!
Shadow: SHUT UP!!!1
Rouge: Coffee!!
Shadow: If you say that one more time, I’ll throw it out of the window…
Rouge: ………
Shadow: Good…
Rouge: Coffee….?
Shadow: THAT’S IT!!!1 *throws coffee maker out of the window*
???: OUCH!!! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT FOR?!!!
Rouge: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Sonic: What the hell…? Is someone in our garden…? O_o
Shadow: … Lets kick his @$$…

They all went outside in the garden, discovering its filled with a lot of characters…



Blain: Dude, what the frack?! O_o
Shadow: Dont look at me, I didn’t invite them… I don’t even know those people!
Kirby: No body invited us…
Rouge: Aw! Look at the little round pink guy! Come here man! Give Rouge a huggy hug!

Kirby: I swear, if you touch me, I’ll bite your head off…
Rouge: O_o
Sonic: What the hell is happening here…?
Kirby: I don’t know! I was walking when suddenly I saw a fat guy with a moustache. The next thing I know was that I woke up here. I started walking and saw a house! Then suddenly I saw a coffee maker flying through the window! O_o

Link: Hey, is this your coffee maker…?
Shadow: Yeah, sorry about that…
Link: It met my head… Anyway, have you seen Zelda…?
All: Eh… Nope, sorry…
Link: What about my Master sword…?
All: ………
Link: Damn it…

Fox McCloud: Has anyone see my StarWing…?
Falco Lombardi: Fox is stupid… I HATE YOU FOX!!!1
Peppi: DO A BARRELROLL!!!1
Slippy: Hi… Meh name ish Slippy, I fly teh starwings and… Where’s mummy?!!1

Bomberman: SO LIKE, YEAH MAN!! NAMCO GAVE ME THESE BOMBS TO BLOW shoot UP!!! ITS LIKE…… I’M SOME KIND OF TERRORIST MAN!!!

Pacman: GET IN MEH BELLY!!!
Ghost: O_o

Sonic: What the hell is happening here?!
Shadow: I don’t fracking know! It’s crazy!

Kirby: Well, that fat guy said something about taking over Nintendo and Sega, and his next move was to take over EA Games. He was blabbering about something to transport all the characters in the game Battlefield 2142, where the world is covered in ice and the EU and PAC coalitions fight to survive for the last remaining land.

Shadow: So…
Kirby: If I’m correct, I think that he places us in that game to wipe us out…

Sonic: So if we all get killed… That means Eggman can set up his own game industry without the rivalry of Nintendo, Sega and EA Games…

Shadow: Clever bastard…
Rouge: So… We’re all gonna die…?
Sonic: Basically… Yes…
Rouge: Well that just sucks…
Blain: It’s a war game…?
Kirby: Yup…
Blain: Sweet…

Then a few persons fall out of the sky…



???: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!1

Guys go splat…



Sonic: Well, if it isn’t that Italian pasta munching son of a dog…
Mario: Hmpf…
Sonic: You suck…
Luigi: You suck!!
Shadow: Shut the hell up.
Luigi: O_o

Princess Peach: *Sighs…* Boys…
Rouge: Yeah… You cant live with them, cant live without ‘em…
Knuckles: Well, I can live without you and-
Rouge: *Kicks Knuckles*

Then suddenly, a little annoying guy flies towards him…



Bokkun: LISTEN UP YOU BUNCH OF IDIOTS!!!
All: O_o
Bokkun: DR EGGMAN HAS A MESSAGE FOR YA!!!
All: T_T
Bokkun: *gets out tv*
Eggman: Hello! In my latest attempt to take over the world, I’ve decided to take over Sega and Nintendo! I’m on the brink of taking over EA Games and when I finally take over, I can start my own game industry! I already have a name for my début game! Eggman Adventure! Eggman Adventure 2! Eggman Heroes! Eggman the Human! Eggman Battle! Eggman Rush! Eggman Advance!

Kirby: Eeh… One question…
Eggman: *sighs* What is it…?
Kirby: Well eeh… Mr Eggman sir, or whatever the hell your name is… If you’re gonna take over Nintendo and Sega, which consoles are you gonna release the games…? I mean, its so stupid!

Eggman: I’ll make my own console! I’ll kidnap Bill Gates and create the Egg-Box!

Falco: That’s just a stupid copy of the X-Box! Oh and by the way, Fox still sucks…

Eggman: I DON’T CARE!!! MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WILL LOVE ME!!! NOW PREPARE TO DIE!!!1

Shadow: One question…?
Eggman: *Sighs* Fine! What is it?!
Shadow: Do you happen to have some banana bread…? I’m starving…
Eggman: Eeh, no, I just ate the last piece this morning...
Shadow: Damn it…
Eggman: Sorry… Anyway! Prepare to be transported in to the future and be annihilated!!! MWUAHAHAHAHAHA!!1

Bokkun: You guys are gonna die! Njuuuuuu!!
Shadow: Then lets start with you…
Bokkun: O_o

Shadow jumped on Bokkun and bashed him senseless… Then suddenly, a bright light appears from the distance…



Kirby: Whoa… What is that…?
Sonic: Chaos Control…

Not long after that, everyone got swallowed up by the bright light… Few moments later… They arrived in the future…


Shadow: Aw… My head…
Kirby: What is this place…? It’s so cold!
Shadow: Hell…
Kirby: I thought hell was suppose to be warm!
Shadow: Shut up… Take a look at the city…


Kirby and Shadow are looking towards a devastated city…



Kirby: You think we’re getting back home soon…?
Shadow: Probably… We need to find the others first…

Then suddenly, Blain ran by with a few soldiers…



Shadow: Blain!!
Blain: Hey! Wassup?

Shadow looks at Blain, who was dressed in the EU’s uniform, packed up with a weapon…



Shadow: Where the hell did you get those…?
Blain: Easy! I took it from a kit!
Shadow: What?
Blain: Hey, if we’re gonna die out here, atleast we can shoot some guys before we go…

Shadow: Yeah!
Blain: Come on! I’ll show you!

Kirby, Shadow, Blain and the soldiers ran to the EU base and chose a kit…



Shadow: *looks at weapon*
Blain: What…?
Shadow: How the hell does this thing work…?
Blain: It’s the Scar-11. State of the art weapon. Point, and pull the trigger…
Shadow: Ah…
Blain: Come on! Let’s go! Assault this position!
Soldier: Right-o!
Blain: Sorry Shadow, you cant join my squad, its full. I’m a squad leader! I’ve got responsibilities and-

Shadow: ……… *shoots the soldiers*
Blain: O_o
Shadow: ^_^
Blain: I guess there’s room now… Wanna join…? Shadow: Right-o!
Kirby: Can I join…?
Blain: Sure…. T_T

Shadow: But its only the 3 of us!
Blain: What if you start your own squad…?
Shadow: Me?
Blain: Yeah. This is Alpha. You can be Bravo.
Shadow: Sweet…

Blain: Ok, say the magic words… I’m the squad leader of Bravo...
Shadow: Why?
Blain: Because then you’ve created your squad and people will start joining…
Shadow: I’m the squad leader of Bravo… T_T
Blain: I’m the squad leader of Alpha…

Then suddenly, people joined… The summary of the squads:



Alpha BravoBlain: Squad leader. Shadow: Squad leader

Fox: Team member knuckles: Team member

Link: Team member Bomberman: Team member

Mario: Team member Peppi: Team member

Falco: Team member Slippy: Team member

Rouge: Team member Princess Peach: Team member
Kirby: Team member Luigi: Team member

Megaman: Team member Sonic: Team member



Shadow: Well, that was easy… O_o

Fox: Oer! A tank!
Falco: STAY AWAY FROM THAT TANK!!! >_<

Blain: Squad! Listen up!
All: O_o
Blain: You see a variety of vehicles. Find a buddy and team up!

So eventually… Fox and Falco chose the tank… Kirby, Mario and Link got in a car…



Rouge: What am I suppose to do…? Blain: I saved the best for last… Look behind you…

Rouge turned around and saw a battlewalker… O_o



Rouge: What the hell is that…………..? O_o
Blain: It’s the L5 Riesig lad… A large mech…
Rouge: Jump in!

They both got in…



Blain: Onwards! *squishes princess peach*


Deathconsole: Rouge [ L5 Riesig ] teamkill Princess Peach.



Rouge: Sorry mate!
Shadow: Thanks a lot dumb @$$, now I’m 1 man short on my squad… T_T

So after Blain’s squad has left…


Shadow: Great…
Megaman: Where to…… sir…?
Commander: Squadleader! Assault these coordinates!
Shadow: But that’s at the other end of the map! O_o
Sonic: And its hostile!
Commander: Proceed as ordered soldier!!

Shadow: *sighs* Fine… Squad, attack this coordinate…
All: Right-o!
Shadow: *Sighs…*
Slippy: OMG GUYS!!11`AN AIR TRANSPORT!!11 AND IT FLIES!!11
Peppi: How about if I fly that thing…?
Shadow: Why…?
Peppi: Because I’m an experienced Starwing fighter pilot…
Shadow: Sure…

So Peppi started up the air transport… Everyone got in…



Peppi: Choppers are fun! I can fly!
Princess Peach: Hey! Wait for me!
Luigi: OH DEAR GOD!!! SHOOT IT!!!


Deathconsole: Luigi [ UD-12 Shepherd ] teamkill Princess Peach


Slippy: GO PEPPI!!!
Luigi: Eehm… Wasn’t Princess Peach killed before…?
Shadow: …… Shut up…

Then suddenly, the air transport thing started to take off and immediately flew backwards and started to flip over.



Shadow: BAIL OUT!!!1

Shadow jumped out with Knuckles… Shortly after that, the air transport thing exploded…


Deathconsole: Peppi [ UD-12 Shepherd ] teamkill Sonic

Peppi [ UD-12 Shepherd ] teamkill Slippy

Peppi [ UD-12 Shepherd ] teamkill Luigi

Peppi [ UD-12 Shepherd ] teamkill Bomberman

Peppi killed himself.



Shadow: Damn it… Looks like we’re going on foot then…
Knuckles: For fracks sake, if we keep up like this, we can just about commit suicide!!

Shadow: Yeah… Let’s go… We have to win this game… I don’t wanna die!!
Knuckles: *looks at a dead Sonic* So long buddy…
Shadow: Poor bastard…

Then suddenly, they could hear footsteps behind them…



Shadow: Ssh… There’s someone behind us…
Knuckles: On three… We turn around and shoot him…
Shadow: Three!!
Sonic: Hey guys!! *gets shot*

Deathconsole: Shadow [ Scar-11 ] teamkill Sonic



Shadow: O_o
Knuckles: What the hell… I don’t like this game…
Shadow: fracking hell…

Both: ………… *shifty eyes…. Runs away*

Meanwhile… At Bravo team…



Blain: How’s it going Rouge?!
Rouge: Well… I know I’m piloting this thing… But I’d be honest…
Blain: What is it…?
Rouge: I cant see where I’m going…
Blain: Well then look at the monitor, you can see outside…
Rouge: *looks at monitor*
Blain: Well…? Rouge: We’ve been walking against a wall for half an hour now…
Blain: Go in reverse…
Rouge: Ok…
Blain: Hey, this thing is getting tilted, you sure your going the right way…?
Rouge: *looks at monitor* OH GOD!!! GET OUT!!!

They both ejected from the Battlewalker… Few moments after that, the Battlewalker tumbles down a cliff…



Rouge: Whoa… That was close…
Blain: Damn it… Don’t ever do that again… Next time, I’ll drive…
Rouge: Well I- *gets hit by car and tumbles down the cliff*

Link: Oh… Sorry… You know, this thing doesn’t drive like a horse…
Blain: Shut the hell up… And shove over, I’m gonna drive…
Kirby: Aren’t you mad about the fact that Link killed your girl…?
Blain: First off, she isn’t my girl… Second, no, because Rouge can spawn at our location…

Then suddenly Rouge appears in the back seat…



Rouge: O_o
Blain: Welcome back…
Rouge: That was weird…
Blain: Falco! Fox!
Fox: Yes sir?!
Blain: Where are you?!
Fox: We’re at the position you located us to attack! We’re taking fire! Those bastards keep throwing grenades!

Blain: We’re almost there… Hang on!

And so… Blain arrived with his… ehm… Squad to the location he had to attack…

Blain: Fox!
Fox: *still in tank* YEAH!?!
Blain: You’re not taking fire…

Then suddenly an explosion is heard… Blain jumps up and looked at the other side… Falco stood there… Throwing grenades at the tank…



Falco: Stupid Fox…
Blain: T_T
Falco: I hate you!
Blain: STAND DONE SOLDIER!! YOU ARE A MENACE!!!
Falco: O_o
Blain: LISTEN UP SQUAD!! THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO SURVIVE THIS HELLHOLE!!! STICK TOGETHER AND WITH THE OBJECTIVES!! THEN WE CAN ALL GO HOME IN ONE PIECE!!!

Falco: Or go home in pieces in a bodybag…
Blain: ……
Falco: It’s so cold… I’ve seen dead people everywhere! I wanna go home!!! I’M SCARED!!!

Blain: STOP SPREADING RETARD ALL OVER THE PLACE AND PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER dog!!! *slaps Falco*

All: O_o
Blain: You see that flag over there…?
Rouge: Yeah…?
Blain: Now… We’re all gonna stand close to it… Kill any enemy’s we see on sight… AND WE’RE GONNA KICK SOME @$$!!! AM I RIGHT MARINES?!!!

All: O_o
Blain: I SAID!! AM I RIGHT MARINES?!!
Rouge: Eeh… Sure…
Blain: WHAT?!! I CANT HEAR YOU!!!
All: Yeah…
Blain: AM I RIGHT?!!!
All: YES SIR!!!
Blain: Hmm hmm… Damn right I am! Line up!! Turn right! March!

They all marched to the flag…



Blain: I don’t know but I’ve been told!
All: Rouge’s boobs are mighty cold!
Rouge: T_T

After Rouge kicked each and every @$$ of the squad, they hold control of the outpost…



Commander: Outpost secured!
All: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!1 *dancing and prancing like some idiots*
Fox: We’ve won!!
Falco: Hold me Fox! *hugs Fox*
Luigi: We can go home!
Mario: YIPPIE!!1
Kirby: Eeh… I’m sorry to burst your bubbles guys but eeh…
All: O_o
Kirby: The game is far from over… We’ve managed to take over one… But eeh… There are a shoot load of control points…

Then suddenly… Sounds are being heard…



Rouge: You hear that…?
Luigi: What…?
Rouge: Ssh…
Blain: It’s an oribital strike… *runs away*
All: A what-

Everyone goes kablewey…



Blain: *Sighs*
Commander: Assault this position…
Blain: Negative… My squad is dead!
Commander: Attack these coordinates.
Blain: No can do…
Commander: Push forward to this position…
Blain: WILL YOU SHUT UP?!!!
Commander: O_o


Meanwhile… Shadow’s squad reached an outpost… There trying to capture it but there under fire… They all shoot like a bunch of idiots…



Sonic: Enemy infantry spotted!
Shadow: I CAN SEE THAT ASSHOLE!! JUST SHOOT THEM!!!
Peppi: DO A BARRELROLL!!!
Slippy: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!
All: O_o
Knuckles: SHADOW LOOK OUT!!!
Shadow: OH shoot!!1

A soldier ran to Shadow and tried to stab him… Shadow punched him a few times with his gun and blew his brains out…



Sonic: ENEMY INFANTRY SPOTTED!!!
Shadow: I KNOW THAT!!!
Sonic: NO BEHIND US!!!
Shadow: OH CRAP!! BOMBERMAN!! YOU’RE UP!!
Bomberman: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!1 *runs towards the soldiers*
Shadow: What’s wrong with that guy…

Bomberman runs to the soldiers…



Bomberman: HEY WASSUP GUYS?!!! LET’S HAVE A PARTY!! WHEEEEEEEEEEE!!! *blows himself up*

Deathconsole: Bomberman [ C8 explosives ] L. Gustavson

Bomberman [ C8 explosives ] R. Argento
Bomberman [ C8 explosives ] C. Petramaistre
Bomberman [ C8 explosives ] D. Gothberg

Bomberman [ C8 explosives ] O. Mestradento

Bomberman killed himself.



Commander: Position cleared and under control.
Shadow: Good job guys…

Then Shadow looks down at wounded Knuckles, laying on the ground…



Shadow: KNUCKLES!!
Sonic: Wait! I can revive him! *gets out defibrillator*
All: O_o
Sonic: CLEAR!! *zaps him*
Knuckles: Whoa! Thanks! I owe you one! O_o
Sonic: Clear!
Shadow: Sonic, Knuckles is already revived and if you shock him now, he;’ll-
Sonic: Clear! *zaps him*

Deathconsole: Sonic [ Defibrillator ] teamkill Knuckles


Shadow: *Sighs*
Sonic: Eehm… Sorry…
Bomberman: WHEEEEEEE!! I’M BACK!!!
Shadow: Great… Let’s go…
All: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
Shadow: *Sighs*

To be continued…

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