Chapter 2 - My Metal Box

     I'm far from done, but so are you, hanging me with a wire from the roof until
I'm two. Are you through? This has got to stop. I'm crawling into a tomb only to
rott. I'm falling from your fist, taking a shot. Peel away at my face when you
want another taste. Take away the soothing pain just to slap the smile from my face.
You say I am only a stain on the rug you walk on, it's better to here it than to see
it. I'd rather be a crack on the ground you fall on, you'd rather fear it than to be it.
     Spread what's left of my life apart until all that's
there is you, holding a bullet in your hand just for me. This isn't how it's suppose
to be, but I'm not giving you the pleasure of knowing you've broken me. I will laugh
away this day, stand and take away my shame. With the strength that remains I will
break away these chains. I have no more skin to burn, so lick away these flames.
And like colliding tidal waves, destroying everything in our path, we crash and break
while we fade away, no longer fearing the damage of your wrath.
     Just your same old games we play everyday, though games
are all we have, I want to play my way. You're a stalemate waiting to crash, I'm one
move ahead of you, moving too fast. I want your king, as bad as you want to see that
bullet rip through me. Your strategy takes me where I want to be; in the arms of my
enemy. The closer you are to me, the more you will take from me. And all I have is this
ache in me, born from the pain you gave to me. So take it and run, with one pawn left,
I am still not done.
     This is my story of vengeance. I will burry you with me if it takes my life
to end this. Unlock the metal box you turned my heart into while trying to make
me become you. Let the heat burn deep into your face, let the steam penetrate
until you suffocate. Pull this knife from my chest and take away your misery with
everything you left. You focus on a part of me to shatter my sanity. I drag along
these chains of mine to strangle your vanity. You're leaving cuts and scars as
you rave and ravage me, molding me into your raving fantasy. The injection is
set. I break the needle in your neck. The poison flows with the cold in your chest.
For all you have taken from me, you have left my last breath. So it's your fault if
I live, it's mine if I lose. Build a mountain to tear it down, if that's
what you choose.
     The fever falls over you into a dazing dream, covers you in a numbing sting.
On your knees, looking up at me, your peircing stare nails me to the air.
Frozen in time, this moment is mine. The adrenaline rushes through you,
you target my life. With another burst of hate, you charge at me with all your
might. A quick slash through the heart tears me apart. The line drops flat
and the sound goes sharp. Falling in pieces, I land in the dark. Awakened
by a tug, I'm dragged through a hole. Torn from the warmth of life, I'm dead
in the cold. My sight fades to white. The bright light hurts my eyes. But it's not my
time, my reason for living is not yet justified. With conviction I stand, your
face engraved in my mind. I turn, run, I lunge back into the dark side.
     I'm thrown back to life, once again trembling; you don't get used to the
feeling. Air fills my body, my blood stops rotting. Digging my grave with your
hands, behind you I stand. You still think I'm dead. Your name drips from my
lips, then suddenly, you turn your head. Back into battle we thrust,
our bodies - only shells to crush. You scream to bring sharp havoc down my
back. I pound on your chest to form a crack. Smoke expels through in
immense blocks, bearing the hollow cave you place your box. Daylight
glistens off the metal, a blinding force spraying rays in yellow. For so long
I've told myself how I need you, but now, I know how to beat you.
     I fall into you, clutching your rusting metal box. Momentum sends us
skidding along the gentle rocks. You claw at my neck, every move you
choose suggests death. Dear life holds on to me, as I hold on to you. In
your waning moments, your motions emit intoxicating truth. I am only a
shade of what I was when I was something I wouldn't have forgotten, I
know that. But in my empty soul has gathered a hand-made rage built
to slave a purpose of pain, and I won't hold back. My shade, tinted in
grey, is stale and weak. The colors drained from my body stain your teeth.
I pull away, breaking your hold, facing a mystery like a story untold. In my
arms your box dawns a puzzle. My confusion warps into a craze too subtle.
As the dust clears, struggling with the locks, I look at you, looking at me, your
holding my metal box.
     Your sour grin strikes me with a sudden sense of reality. This may be my
closing act on a stage riddled with blasphemy. It will be my masterpiece. I try
to pry the lid open with my fingernails, while your laughter rings in sheets to
see me fail. Casually, you trace the code to brave my lock. I fight a whirlwind
of numbers in paradox. Until you've come to the final digit of the code, I remiss
the world. Motion slows. In this moment, our moment, after all has crashed
down to the level of men, pulled from behind our masks, all we have is this sin.
     I hear a click, echoing through my ears. The fears I've gathered through my
years couldn’t mount this monster of a fear I fear is you near the edge of the
cliff from which I exist. You don't need to push me, 'cause I'm pulling you
with me.
     That echo, still drumming, keeps running through my mind, hugging my
spine. I know what you know, there are no more people or places, there is no
more time. This is it, there's just you and I. And I promise, this time...
I will show you how it feels to die.
     That click, you've unlocked my metal box in an instant. I'm far from done, but
you still haven't won. Built up in the fore-front of what drives me, is the sum of
all you've done inside me. It's evident, you despise me, but now, I'm angry.
     Before you can open my metal box, you have to taunt me first. There's
your mistake, that sour grin is not your win, it's your curse. frack your locks
and codes, and everything else your box holds. I aim all the strength I have
left into my hands. I dig my fingers into the metal like sand. Our eyes meet
one last time, I rip open your metal box with one last try. The scorching steam
hisses out with a forcing scream. Chemicals inside and remnants of metal
scrape against each other with the impact I need. A spark. An explosion. It's
over in a blink.
     Lying on my back, I begin to wake. I open my eyes and let them dilate. You
couldn't have survived that blast. Or at least, you shouldn't have. My sight comes
into focus and I see you. The blast shattered my metal box and half of you to. I
don't want to see what it's done to me. I'll just accept the fact that now I'm free.
No more fighting, the pain is slowly dying. I watch you bleed as you barely
breathe. Collecting your remains you begin to crawl away. Looking for a safe
place. I want to move but I'm paralyzed. So I just watch you close your eyes.
You're all I see, dying, like me.
     I hold on. I need to hear your final breath. I need to be sure when you're at
rest. You stop moving, but I can still feel your heartbeat pound through the ground.
The rhythm loses it's pattern, now everything you've ever done to everyone
doesn't matter. One long breath, followed by one broken heartbeat. And finally,
you're at peace.
     It ends. I let go and I'm comatose. They’re all liars; my life isn't
flashing before my eyes, my life is fading into the night. Thinking back, it hurt
to know you, it even hurt to hold you. How did you live with all that madness
inside you? It's ironic, in my defining hour I'm catatonic. Well, I think I'll
just lie here and let myself die. Give in to that pull from life this time.

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